Disorientation and Reorientation

Wednesday 4/8/20 6:35 AM

Two or three times per week I review my memory verses as I go for my morning walk. I take my flash cards with me, look at the scripture verse on one side, and then recite the verse that is written out on the other side. I have been doing this now for about eight months so I can go through all the verses in about forty minutes. This morning I was having some difficulty recalling some of the verses. I seemed a little disoriented and I had a hard time focusing on the verses. There were two verses in particular that I couldn’t recall and eventually had to turn the card over so I could remember how it began. Those verses were Ephesians 4:2, “Be completely humble and gentle, be patient, bearing with one another in love.”, and Hosea 12:6 “But you must return to your God, maintain love and justice, and wait for your God always.”

After I had gone through the entire stack of cards I went back to review those two verses and I noticed the phrases “be patient” and “wait for your God always.” For the last couple of weeks we have been under a stay at home order. The only place I have gone is the grocery store a few times to buy fresh fruit and vegetables and yesterday I went to the doctor’s office for an appointment. Our entire society has ground to a halt as most people stay home with their family and it seems this will continue through the rest of April and into May. It is easy to get cabin fever and it is difficult to simply wait it out. This morning I think God wanted to remind me to be patient and to wait.

I laughed as I began typing Ephesians 4:2 in the previous paragraph. I was trying to type it from memory but it didn’t seem right when I read it. I went to the flash card and noticed that I had typed, “Be completely humble and gentle, bearing with one another in love.” Ironically, I had forgotten the two words “be patient.” I guess I am more disoriented than I thought or I still haven’t learned what God wanted to teach me.

In their book Companions in Christ, Rueben Job and Marjorie Thompson write about how Jesus had been firmly oriented in his relationship with God and had received divine affirmation at the time of his baptism and transfiguration. They continue with these words, “Surely the experience of temptation in the wilderness was one of disorientation and reorientation for Jesus. … Even more the agony of Gethsemane, the experience of betrayal and denial by his closest human companions, and the ultimate horror of feeling abandoned even by God reveal a depth of disorientation in Jesus’ life journey that defies our comprehension. Yet Jesus pioneered for us the ultimate reorientation to God’s loving purpose in the glory of his resurrection. God’s final word is life, not death; communion, not separation!” Perhaps the disorientation I experienced while trying to remember my verses is simply a symptom of a broader disorientation and confusion I have about what God is doing through the crisis of this pandemic. Perhaps God’s desire is that I become reoriented to him while patiently waiting for him to fulfill his purposes through it all. God wants communion with me, not separation, and he is giving me more time to commune with him. The question is: Will I use the time for that purpose?