Playing to Lose

Friday 2/8/19 5:41 AM

I enjoy playing cribbage, a card game in which the first player to score 120 points wins. The strategy is to score points without giving your opponent any opportunities to score points. I often play with my son-in-law, Ryan, when we visit them during the summer or when they come to visit around Christmas. Occasionally we play the game with the rules reversed, that is, the first player to score 120 points loses. Then the best strategy is to give away all the points you can to your opponent without scoring points yourself. It is very difficult to change your mindset to that of trying to lose the game. It goes against everything you know about the rules of the game and the best strategy to win.

Today I read this quote by Evelyn Underhill in her book The Spiritual Life. She writes, “Osuna says that God plays a game with the soul called ‘the loser wins’; a game in which the one who holds the poorest cards does best. The Pharisee’s consciousness that he had such an excellent hand really prevented him from taking a single trick.” I think I agree with Osuna, if the Bible is true.

I live in a culture that prizes wealth, power, prestige, fame, and so on. The culture is best described by the old bumper sticker, “The man with the most toys wins.” The best way to achieve success in this kind of culture is to do whatever it takes to get money, power, etc. If one has to dupe others or put them at a disadvantage to achieve your goal, so be it. When it comes to my personal advancement, others be damned.

The Bible teaches us to look to the interests of others rather than looking out for our own interests. We are to love our enemy and to do good to those who hate us. We are to forgive those who do us harm without seeking revenge. We are to go out of our way to help others, without regard for what it might cost us. It is very difficult to adopt that kind of a mindset in this culture, just like it is hard to play cribbage to lose. The best way to become proficient at that kind of game is to practice, practice, practice. Lord, give me eyes filled with love and compassion for others.

A Deaf Ear

Friday 2/1/19 5:06 AM

Psalm 28:1 reads, “To you, Lord, I call; you are my rock, do not turn a deaf ear to me.” I’ve read this verse many times before, but I’ve never thought of the image of someone turning a deaf ear toward someone else, let alone God doing so.

I have a friend who lost the hearing in her right ear a number of years ago due to a viral infection. Whenever I speak with her, she always cocks her head, turning her left ear toward me, which allows her to hear me speak. In my experience, she has never turned her deaf, right ear toward me. The only time I can envision her doing that would be if she didn’t want to engage in conversation, or if she wanted to tune me out when I’m droning on about inconsequential matters.

My grandchildren can be very persistent. Occasionally when I am in a conversation with someone else one of my grandchildren will come into the room excitedly, saying, “Papa, Papa, Papa, …” They persist by calling my name until I acknowledge them in some manner, either by ending my conversation or by reminding them to wait until I have finished my conversation with the other person. However, from their perspective it may seem as if I have turned a deaf ear toward them.

I’ve had similar feelings about God when I am going through difficult times and it seems as if he doesn’t hear my pleas for help. I begin to doubt if he is really there at all or, even worse, he is there, but doesn’t care. Perhaps God is trying to teach me to patiently live with uncertainty, or pain, or anxiety, trusting him to either step in to deliver me from it, or to console me in the midst of it in due time.

The shoe can also be put on the other foot. How many times does God speak to me, asking me to encourage a friend, to console someone who is grieving, or to seek justice for someone who is powerless, but I turn a deaf ear to God? Does he repeatedly call my name, “Mark, Mark, Mark, …”, trying to tell me of his love for me, while I go about my daily routine with my deaf ear turned to him.

Lord, forgive me for turning a deaf ear toward you, and toward others with whom I have contact. Give me the grace to hear your voice and the voices of those around me and give me the courage to act in a way that will bring healing to me and to others.