Joy and Frustration

Wednesday 2/29/2012 5:01 AM

Saturday I am scheduled to present an article I wrote about a year ago for Mathematics Teacher magazine on cyclic numbers to a group of community college math professors at our annual math conference.  The article is the result of a problem that I have contemplated and periodically worked on for over ten years.  The initial problem was straightforward and I solved it relatively quickly but, as is often the case in mathematics, I generalized the problem and tried to find a solution to the generalized problem.  This process led down many side paths, which resulted in both frustrating dead ends and exhilarating insights.  I distinctly remember jumping around throughout my living room after getting an insight that unlocked the secret to the problem and yet I still am puzzled by the paradoxes that have been generated by working with infinite series as I continue my reflection on the process.  Over the past few days I have spent the bulk of my mental energy trying to decide what to include in my presentation and what to leave out.  I would like to communicate both the joy and the frustration that accompanied my journey but I fear that my audience will not be able to experience it in the same way without having traveled the ten-year path.

In my relationship with God I also experience frustrating dead ends and exhilarating insights.  At times I am surprised to find God’s grace in unexpected places and at other times I feel as if I am following God closely only to find myself drifting aimlessly through life or to watch a door close on a path I was convinced was God’s will for me.  I meet with a group of men each week to share the joys and frustrations I have in my walk with God.  At times they suggest that I share my experiences with others but I think the same way about my walk with God as I do about my math problem.  While I want others to experience the great joy I have in my relationship with God and to be encouraged by my frustrations when they are going through frustrations of their own, it seems that others will not be able to experience things in the same way without traveling the path.

The Bible clearly states that we are to encourage one another and spur one another on toward love and good deeds.  The problem I have is knowing how to do that most effectively.